I have two daughters with two distinct ways of eating their eggs. One will only eat them boiled (and it must be done perfectly – not runny nor dry); the other only fried (an omelet with cheese is her favorite). As you can imagine, satisfying the two without making a big mess in the kitchen can be a hassle. Each ‘egg breakfast’ morning, a debate ensues – I’m trying to get them to reach an agreement (maybe today both can have boiled and tomorrow fried) and they`re trying to get what they want (NO!). Suffice it to say I never win and please don’t call me on the fact that there are ALWAYS dishes in my sink.
The irony of food analogies in Ramadan (and while starvation is booming in the horn of Africa) is not lost on me, but bear with me. You see, the struggle for `getting what we want` is something that all can appreciate, but few really APPRECIATE. Of course, the issue isn’t just about eggs – it goes much deeper. Sometimes its about making sure a dead-beat dad supports his children or a leader of a country stops oppressing his people or..or..or. Somebody once said that “anything worth having is worth fighting for.” And Corey Hart once sang “You can never surrender” (yes, I’m kind of old like that!). The prophet Muhammad SAW taught us this supplication:
اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ الْهَمِّ وَالْحُزْنِ وَالْعَجْزِ وَالْكَسَلِ وَالْبُخْلِ وَالْجُبْنِ وَضَلَعِ الدَّيْنِ وَغَلَبَةِ الرِّجَالِ
‘O Allah, I take refuge in You from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and laziness, miserliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from being over powered by men.’
I don’t think that Allah wants us to be weak and accommodating so much so that we turn away from the essence of what is important. And yet, we see it all the time. We take garbage all the time and while flexibility is nice and be accommodating is nice – where does it end? Also nice is sticking up for ourselves and all that we hold dear.
I’m youth, I’m joy, I’m a little bird that has broken out of the egg – James M. Barrie
For the most part, children seem to do it all right – at least with the ones they love and feel safe with. But then something happens along the way. Why do they start eating boiled eggs when they want to eat fried? Why do they stop speaking up about their preferences? Why do we take on the mentality of the enslaved – rather than being slaves of Allah alone?
I thought about these questions today- trying to be patient with the egg dilemma -and surmised that maybe someone along the line forces children to eat what they do not want to eat and, in doing so, squashes their desire to choose to be stronger. And maybe I shouldn’t be the one to do that with my daughters. I choose to not do that to my daughters.
This is my long-winded explanation for why I have too many dirty dishes - and why I’m okay with it. Besides, I’ve thought up a solution: I’m sure both girls will agree to eggs made of pure chocolate 
